Tag Archives: The Italian Job

Day 13 of #30daysofme

Day 13 – a letter to someone who has hurt you recently.

I have been thinking about what to write for this post for most of the day, and I still don’t know how to tackle it.  I did have a rough time last year with someone who is no longer a friend, but I don’t wish to air that dirty laundry.  I also don’t want to rehash all of that stuff that made me feel like absolute crap for too long.

I am someone who can feel too much and if I get hurt I tend to stay that way for quite some time.  I don’t see it as holding a grudge, although I guess that most people would see it as that.  It’s not that I don’t forgive people for hurting me, but I have trouble forgetting and I struggle to think of that person in the same way.  I am so afraid that I will be hurt again and made to feel that crap again, that I subconsciously and consciously remove myself from that possibility.

Have you ever seen the original ‘Italian Job’ with Michael Caine?  The song that plays at the very end is ‘Get a Bloomin Move On (The Self-Preservation Society)’.  It’s a fun song, full of rhyming slang, but I really identify with the chorus.  I probably don’t identify with it in the way that was intended, but everybody interprets music and lyrics differently anyway.  Every time that I think about situations or people that I avoid, that chorus plays in my head.  Over and over.  And it helps me to feel better.  I need to avoid some things until I am strong enough to cope with them.  Not the bravest of actions, but this is my ‘self-preservation society’.

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